When It Doesn't Make Sense

So today I received some pretty hard news and I did not take it well. I cried and in my head blamed God. I wanted it to work so bad and now I feel like all my dreams are falling apart. I thought to myself God you carried me this far and now I’m being let go? Why Now? Why God did you lead me in this journey only to watch it all go? Why did I invest so much time in all of this only to watch my dream die? And why especially Now? I was so mad at Him and I was so mad at myself because I didn’t have boundaries. I let myself down. Then the Lord spoke to me through the Casting Crowns song “My child if you only knew all the plans that I have for you…so come on let me dream for you.” His plans are higher and wiser and so much better than mine. I once heard someone tell me that a setback is a setup for God to do something great in your life. At the time I believed it because life was going great. But at this particular moment, all I feel is pain. Will I measure up? Will I ever truly finish something and be successful? I became my own worst enemy and ended up having a pity party. But God is still in control even when it doesn’t make sense. At my worst, He is still the best. In my weakness He is strong. He still loves me and has great dreams for me. I have to let my dreams die in order for His to take root. Breakthrough will happen and His dreams for my life will begin to take place. I will praise Him in the middle of it. When it doesn’t make sense I will yet praise.